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                主頁 > 經典文章 > 愛情故事 > 我愛你但不放心你

                我愛你但不放心你

                2009-07-18 17:33 作者:岑 桑 來源:揚子晚報 已有位網友閱讀 【查看評論
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                本文TAG:放心 魏強 我愛你 程林茜

                  有一種男人,因為父母的婚姻不和諧,從小就在心里埋下了陰影。他們痛恨這種生活模式,卻又在潛移默化中,模仿著他的父母去愛別人。在他們眼里,往往沒有意識到這是個傷人的問題,而你,卻不得不在愛情婚姻里,痛并快樂著。

                  Part One:

                  程林茜的愛情故事U盤里的秘密

                  程林茜29歲,和魏強結婚已經3年了。現在的程林茜有些不知道該怎樣面對魏強,他們曾經是同事,在同一家廣告公司供職。魏強追求她很久,起初程林茜并沒對魏強怎么動心。一個剛入職場生活的女孩,難免心高氣傲。程林茜抱著同樣的心態,無視魏強,希冀自己能找到一個更好的男人。那是2004年的冬天,程林茜認識了王深。王深的家世很好,程林茜被那些花哨的物質生活迷惑了。她和王深談起了戀愛,那是一段很有面子的愛情。程林茜每天上班,王深都會車接連送。只是,年輕讓她不及細想這段愛情究竟會有多久。

                 



                  一日,程林茜和王深從酒吧回來,已經很晚了。沒想到,在公寓樓的門口,她遇見了魏強。魏強縮在大衣里,像等了很久。程林茜問他,“有事嗎?”魏強猶豫了一下,塞給她一個U盤,就低頭走了。程林茜覺得有些奇怪,回家后把U盤接進電腦。沒想到是段音頻,魏強的聲音從電腦的音箱里傳出來。魏強說:“小茜,我面對你,有些話就不知道該怎樣和你說。我雖然錢沒有王深多,但愛你,他對你的愛一定沒我多,不信你去一個叫‘深深深’的博客看一看吧。”

                  魏強提到的博客,博主就是王深。程林茜在上面看到了自己,只不過,她并不是王深博客里惟一的女主角。那一天,她氣急敗壞地打電話給王深,但讓她想不到的是,王深并不否認,并且還有些自得地說:“不想玩,你可以退出,我絕不攔你。”

                  程林茜從沒想過,這份讓她一直引以為傲的愛情,竟會這樣輕易地看見了陰暗的背面。

                  不想再做朋友

                  程林茜再遇到魏強,是在第二天的公司里。雖然她清楚魏強是為了自己,但心里卻無故遷怒他多事。只是魏強,并沒有像她想象的那樣趁虛而入,反而刻意和她保持距離。那段感情的空白期,讓程林茜冷靜下來,她開始反思自己張揚虛榮的愛情

                  那天,因為做同一個Case。程林茜和魏強一同留在公司里加班。只有兩個人的辦公室,程林茜多少有些尷尬。魏強反倒很大方地說:“我那么做,只是不希望你上當受騙,沒說要你一定愛我。咱們不能做情侶,還可以做朋友,不是嗎?”“問題是……我不想和你做朋友。”程林茜的話,讓魏強有些難堪,但她卻笑嘻嘻地接著說:“我想和你做情侶。”魏強愣了半晌,才反應過來。他緊緊地抱著程林茜轉了一圈,說:“你放心,我會對你好的。”

                  老公被保安捉了

                  程林茜和魏強的愛情,從這一天起,變得一帆風順。2006年,他們開始籌備結婚。程林茜直到結婚前的三個月,才正式見到了魏強的父母。他們住在外地,對魏強的眼光,贊不絕口。其實,有關未來的公公婆婆,程林茜覺得自己很幸運。因為魏強很早就離開了家,出外求學工作。他全款買下自己的房子,但從沒說過婚后會把父母接來同住。程林茜看過許多同學和公婆住在一起的矛盾和煩惱。那些煩心的事情,看來她都可以省了。

                  然而直到結婚后的一年,程林茜才慢慢發現這段愛情的弊端。那是在2007年的年末,由一家獵頭公司牽線,程林茜成功跳到了一家比較有實力的合資公司,做公關策劃部的主管。剛一入職,程林茜就要面對圣誕、新年以及春節一連串的企劃。程林茜忙得焦頭爛額,幾乎每天都要在公司加班到深夜。

                  那一天,已經是深夜十一點了,程林茜剛剛讓同事回家,自己整理最后的策劃書。沒想到,寫字樓的兩個保安闖了進來,他們挾著一個男人說:“這個男的說認識你。”程林茜沒想到,竟是魏強。她生氣地說:“你們抓著他干什么?他是我老公。接我下班有什么問題,這也太過分了,明天我要投訴你們!”兩個保安也氣粗地不甘示弱,大聲嚷著:“你老公就了不起啊?在門外賊眉鼠眼地站了一個小時,我現在抓他都客氣了。”

                  程林茜愣住了,她沒想到魏強不是來接她,而是來監視她的。那天晚上回家,他們沒說一句話。魏強只換了睡衣,就上床了。程林茜坐在床邊,說:“魏強,你不準備解釋一下嗎?”魏強抿了抿嘴唇,什么也沒說。

                  她強吻了同事

                  后來,程林茜漸漸了解到,魏強之所以不和父母同住,那么早就離開了家,是因為他討厭他的父母,甚至隱隱地憎恨。他的母親曾在早年的時候,有過一段婚外情,為此魏強成長的家庭沒有一天不在爭吵。考上大學的時候,他提前一個月就去學校報到了,不愿在家里多停留一秒。程林茜覺得,魏強那么用功地求學,那么努力地工作,就是為了能盡快逃離那個家。然而現在的魏強,卻不知不覺地復制著自己曾經憎恨的家庭。他就像他父親愛他母親一樣,警覺地愛著程林茜。“愛”與“不放心”成了一臺永遠無法配平的天平。

                  其實,程林茜也找過魏強談話,說夫妻間的信任,說他的母親不代表她,但都收效甚微。魏強每次都誠懇接受,卻堅決不改。程林茜忽然想起了王深,當年魏強抓出他的博客,一定是輕車熟路吧。

                  六月,程林茜的公司參加了社區的公益活動,程林茜和一個男同事分為一組,負責清理路邊圍欄的小廣告。忽然,她看見人頭攢動的過街天橋上,有人在悄悄地向這邊張望。那一刻,程林茜覺得自己的心冷了,她突然扳過同事的頭,猛親了一口,轉身走了。留下路邊、天橋,兩頭錯愕。

                  Part Two:

                  有關程林茜的問題

                  1、程林茜為什么不能改變魏強?

                  因為她要改變的,不是一個男人身上某個不良的生活習慣,而是一個家庭對一個男人由小到大的影響。魏強不是不愛她,也不是不信任,但是,他父親身上最深刻的教訓,已經成為他最慘烈的記憶。這份疼痛根深蒂固地盤踞在他心里,讓他無法再去放心接受一份愛情

                  2、程林茜該怎樣改變魏強?

                  面對魏強這樣的問題,通過簡單的談話,或是發脾氣,是不太可能解決的。誰都知道信任在愛情中的重要,但怎樣增加信任,卻是個難題。對于程林茜來說,能夠說服魏強的父母和魏強重新剖析當年的問題是最好的,因為即便是紛爭不斷的愛情,也總會有情有可原的一面。然而,魏強作為兒子,他只能看到出軌、爭吵、懷疑,而沒有看到他父母對愛情、對家庭的留戀與挽救。如果魏強的父母不愿出面,那么程林茜可以試著與魏強一起重新演繹分析他父母的這段感情。以當事人的身份,以成年人的視角,去體會他父親對愛情的堅持一面,以及她母親對家庭不舍的一面。其實,只有從心理根源上,去解決深埋的心結,才會有希望改變魏強。

                  3、程林茜要不要改變魏強?

                  很明顯,程林茜最后的舉動,帶著對感情的放任。她不想再對這份愛情做什么了。在她心里,這份愛情已經不值得再下這么大的力氣。其實,對于保住一份愛情,向來是見仁見智的問題。一個建立在情感基礎上的東西,未來必定充滿變數。而對于愛情,人無非要面對兩種選擇,一是自己不變,只找合適自己的那一段。這樣的愛情,繁多而短暫。二是迎合愛情轉變,改變自己。這樣的愛情,費心力卻更持久。其實,問程林茜要不要改變魏強,也是在問她,要不要改變自己。是要做一個不為愛情委曲求全的女人,還是做個面對感情波折,見招拆招的女人?沒有人可以幫她回答。

                  

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